New friends, Old flames..

So im out my angsty teenage stage and moving into adulthood. Thank fuck for that, i think some of the darkest moments and blogs i have ever written a few years ago. Its good, with age i think im learning to rashionally think about any problems that arise in life and look at solving it from every angle not just one of my own. So this is a blog with a little happier tone than most previously.

I have finished my first trimester of Uni/SAE today.. finished with an exam, which absolutely slaughtered me.. i think i was confident with maybe 30 percent of the questions being asked. It was ridiculously hard. But on a good note i have 2 weeks of freedom to collect myself, look for a job and get some shit sorted financialy. I been pretty broke lately.. I have been looking for jobs but no luck yet. Im getting into a little bit of dj'ing and mixing atm, and am hoping to get good enough to get a payed a little on the side to do it. I love it, almost as much as i love writing music. I think im pissing my mates off with it though it seems all im doing is telling them "man check this out! this song goes hell good with this one".. but oh well, i have introduced a few of my mates to the programme im using and they are addicted to it as well.

The last couple of weeks i have made a couple of new mates. I make mates all the time but i think these people are really quite something. We have been hanging out heaps the past few weeks and i dno it just never gets old, we all seem to really enjoy eachothers company and have a wicked laugh whenever we are all together.. Everyone is fairly open and truthful to one and other which i think is great. We all smoke a bit of pot and just chill, or play video games, its soo cruisy and there is no massive need to go out and get absolutely totalled. Dont get me wrong i love getting blitzed but its good to have a break from it.

I been quitting smoking lately as well.. this is my 4th time ahah.. I do really well for a while then just fall back into it again. Im only on my 2nd day without it, but i dont feel any withdrawals or massive cravings which is fucking sweet. The first time i properly quit i couldn't sleep properly for 4 days straight and was a moody prick. this time round im fine, just trying to replace the habit with something else..

I seen the old flame mentioned in the previous blog. For the sake of any future blogs, il refer to them as "him" to try and not subject them to any homo criticism. But it was completely unexpected, but i had a feeling at the same time. I was walking to one of my bestmates, chloes house and thought "fuck this, im going the short cut". I usually dont go that way purely cause i have to pass "his" house on the way. But today it was freezing, and raining so i couldnt be fucked making the walk any longer then it had to be. Im walking down to chloes house practically on her street and this person comes round the corner and starts walking up the street. I keep walking not taking too much notice but they kept on looking..

I took my hood off and as we got closer it was "him". I didn't know what to do.. part of me wanted to just be like "What the fuck happened?!" and another part of me just wanted to hug them and tell them how much i had missed them. It was like something from a movie.. The sky was grey, both walking in the rain, and running into eachother.. We met in the middle of the road.. Not even thinking about if a car came round the corner. I offered them a cigarette and we stood there and talked abut what we had been up too.. He is going to do an apprenticeship and move away from mandurah.. It was his girlfriends and his 6 months that day, and he was graduating tafe at the end of the week. I was actually really happy to hear most of it, its good to know he is doing something with himself.

I told him what i had been up 2, some of the highlights of the past few months id wish i could of shared with him at the time. This was literally the first time i had spoken to them in atleast 7 months.. I offered to walk them home and we headed back up the hill to their house.. we stood on his driveway trying to to talk as much as we could before we had to go. I dno, alot was said, but there was still soo much left to say.. I gave them a hug and left to chloes. They said their usually in mandurah on weekends and we should catch up sometime, but i dno. I wouldn't mind talking and hanging out but things wont be the same.. i just have a feeling..

I needed to see "him" though to realise maybe this was for the best.

"her mind has been made up, theres plenty more fish in the sea"