I must say first of all im in love with this verdana font. Everytime i go to post a new blog i have to have it in verdana, OCD? perhaps.. But its been a couple of weeks since my last post. Maybe 2 weeks to be exact. Im not counting the days or anything. Im certainly not counting the days till christmas. Fuck i hate this season. Especially in Australia. Im going to sound like an absolute moaner here but i really hate the unnecessarily hot days we have in summer. Dont get me wrong, i love going out in the sun, maybe not as much as others, but i still enjoy it, i just really cant be fucked with 35 degree days. Once again i leave my christmas shopping to the last minute.. I Went out today to Carousel which is one of the main malls if not the MALL to go to South of the river. Im glad everyone was in the same "cant be fucked" mood as i was.
I was dodging juvie scum and derolicts like no tomorrow. People i once would have waved to if it was mandurah forum. I feel like such a snob coming back to perth, i dont think i have changed though, just dont feel the need to put up with that shit anymore. You may have remember my old housemate shaun from previous blogs. He was one of my good friends. I use was because now it seems he doesn't want a bar of it, has no idea about what being a friend means. He did go through a mildly rough time, he broke up with his bf of 2years, which i was empathetic about, but its hard to show empathy when all he does is bag out his ex, who im still friends with. I understand people break up, but i dont think there is a real need to be so horrible to an ex if it was probably the best thing they could have both done.
I had been on shauns case for a while though. I had gave him (well my mother did) a big cabinet and television for when he moved into his own house. We agreed a $100 would be fine, it wasn't a big ask. It was worth atleast double what we were asking and he was keen for it. That was late september, and we had moved to perth. Its now December and we hadn't seen or heard or anything about it. I had asked him numberous times. I had asked him politely as my mum was on my fucking back about this $100 all the time. I really didn't see the big deal at first but we had moved and spent alot of money, we were broke some weeks and barely scraping by, that 100 would of been pretty handy especially around the christmas season.
We had an arguement anyway, i constantly see him posting statuses about how he is going out clubbing.. It really fucking pissed me off. We really needed that money. I had told him if he was strapped for cash it was cool but we really need it or id pick the cabinet up and we could sell it. I really couldn't be arsed picking up the cabinet. i Just wanted the cash so it was all good again. He started saying i dont give a shit about whats going on, how he had broken up with johan and how his sister just suddenly moved out. I did feel for him in all honesty, but after seeing all these updates about how he is going out all the time i had enough. I found it hypocritical. When chloe owed him around $200 he was on her case everyday, saying how pissed off he is and how he fucking hates her. He got it within 3 weeks. 3 months now and nothing. I ended up being a bit of a smart arse.
Shauns fb status update:
"I hate it when gay guys use you and rip you off"
myself:
"Yeh it sucks.. trust me.."
we ended up having a massive arguement. He said i have been spoon fed all my life. Which is not true, that is one thing that pisses me off. People who think i work for nothing? 95% of everything i own is all from my hard work and saving. I do get help when i need it, not because im spoon fed, because i ask for it. I was sick of all this shit, i had enough. I said i dont want anything to do with him, im not spoon fed, i just dont go around thinking the world is always fucking against me.
The new guy isn't going to well either. We have remained friends, but not without complications. Its not hard these days to go around and visit him without wanting anything. We have got to a nice level of friendship. But i feel like im getting used. And after "him" i really have no time for it. I have been out looking at houses with one of my bestfriends luke and his girlfriend tayla. Jack asked me to pick him up from somewhere close to an hours drive away from where i live. We had finished the house viewing and i was keen to just relax and unwind with "j". I called them up asking if they wanted picked up and if they wanted to do something tonight. My full was almost empty but i didn't really care, my payment when in the next day so i would be alright for fuel in the morning. I drove out to belmont. Fucking trek. I arrived at the house and he stumbled out towards the car. He was pretty stoned. He told me he had vallium to. Instantly i was a little pissed i knew where this was going.
j: "i cant wait to get home and wash my hair and go to bed."
there it was. After looking at shitholes all day and driving copious hours here i am wasting my time again. i was fucking angry and aggitated. I had his christmas present in the car too. Hoping we could chill at his and give it to him. I didn't want to speak to him. I had a bit of a yell, i just wanted to go home on what little fuel i had. He gave me fuel money in the end, but i was still annoyed, all i wanted to do was go see them and unwind. we made up though, he didn't remember much he was pretty fucked when i got him. it just seems like im making all the effort for a friendship i didn't really want in the first place? their beautiful and their great, i jsut wish they made a little more effort as gay as it sounds. Im not dependant on him, but it would still be nice to know i could depend on him? fuck its wierd i dno.. its too early in the morning for writing much longer.
il probs blog again in jan
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